Tonight, I am grateful for the support I received from friends in my church community who thanked me for writing that post last week, which was so hard to write. Several people told me that it was well written and powerful. Well, thanks. Also that it seems likely that the institution will change, one way or another. Hopefully for the better.
Kids are important to church life. I actually said to someone, “Well, you need the grey haired folks to pay the bills, and you need the kids to carry on the traditions… and everyone in between, too.” Church needs all the people.
I am struggling with postpartum mood disorder. It pains me to admit this. I want to be so perfect all the time and I can’t. I just need to give that up. Can’t be Supermom. Gotta be me. Sometimes the reality of my life is more than I can bear. At these times, I really just need to take a nap.
I did that today, after church, lunch, and getting the girl to sleep.
My husband said, “Your car is a disaster!” So he cleaned it out today. Power washed the outside, vacuumed, washed windows, did the armor all thing to the dash. I’m impressed and grateful. I just need to keep focusing on the good. I will be okay. Okay seems like less than what I would like right now, but just about what I can deliver. I need to adjust my expectations.
One of the blessings of sharing that I am dealing with postpartum is that others share their stories with me and I feel less isolated and alone. This is a real blessing.
I have so much more to be grateful for but I need to go to bed now. I have a great life, filled with blessings.