Dramatis Personae

I really wish I could get my hair to do this.
I wish my hair would do this.

Myself:

Vampire old. Theologian (former lots of denominations; current Unitarian Universalist Pagan). Asthmatic. Married. Mother of two precious effing cherubs. Survivor of child sexual assault. Recovering alcoholic with ten + years sober.

My Superpower is The Laugh. My totem animal is The Moon.

When I’m feeling witchy, I go by “Analuna.”

the hubs would hate Tim Allen
as his celebrity icon. meh. it fits.


The Hubs
:
Sarcastic. Epileptic. Gooey center (good with other people’s crying). Eagle Scout. Current student at WGU. Former customer service call center monkey.

Fixes anything with moving parts. Fan of motorcycles and power tools. Great with kids, shy around adults. Woodworker, leatherworker.

His Superpower is Dealing With It.

His love language is sarcasm (sigh). His totem animal is a Cat: “Pet-me-pet-me-pet-me. We will never speak of this again.

He is Calvin.
He is Calvin.

Cherub One:
Firstborn. HIGH ENERGY. So much energy, homg. ADHD, SPD, ASD. I’m dealing with all these diagnoses. He’s a great kid. Loves toys. Very verbal. Calls me “Mom.” He is ALL BOY, all the time.

He nicknamed himself “Rainbow Red Rock” when he was four years old. He has such a big heart. He loves his baby sister, and when she was a baby, he would comfort her by singing, “Baby Sister, don’t cry, don’t cry. Big Brother is here. You get all the attention, so don’t cry.” (It was about the most precious thing in the universe.)

His Superpower is Adorableness. He has known it since he was six months old. It is scary sometimes.

His totem animal is a Tornado. Animal from the Muppets. The Tazmanian Devil, ha!

princess celestia
it’s all about unicorns

Cherub Two:  
She is now five. Girlie. Blond. Blue Eyes. The Baby. AKA “SissieBear,” “Peaches.” Calls herself, “Queen Griselda.” Huge smile. Blessing. Recently, she shouted, “I will not tolerate this!” and stamped her foot when we told her it was bedtime. The hubs and I cackled.

Her Superpower: Sass. (One of her preschool teachers called her “Ms. Sassafras.”) Bestie said, “She is an adorable, cherubic tyrant with a whim of steel.”
Her totem animal: Unicorn. It’s all about unicorns these days.

crows on tomb stones
original bestie loves crows

Original Bestie: We met in college, where we were in the Virginia Hall dorm on the third floor. We have now known each other and been friends for about thirty years, and she is so kind and generous and goofy and wonderful. She’s a scientist! She takes care of everyone. She gives until it hurts. She loves crows. That time I told her the most shame-filled “I slept with my boss” story, she said, lovingly, “Well. I think you have enough life experience now. You can write your novel.” She’s so good.

maleficent
“Now you shall deal with me.”

Bestie: Brilliant, hilarious, gooey center, celebrates me and lets me do her dishes. Despite some recent setbacks (can we call it alphabet anagram diagnoses? or is that disrespectful?), she remains a titan of a human.

When all the other girls were playing “Princess Club,” and would not let her join in, she decided to form her own gang as Maleficent. Minions and all. The minions harried the Princesses on the playground and made them cry. “That was the first time I got sent to the Principal’s Office when I was in Kindergarten.”

Her mom is also pretty awesome. Upon being summoned to the Principal’s Office, and told this story, she said calmly, “I assume this is about the other girls bullying my daughter and not letting her join their Princess club?”

Mom is from Nevada.
Mom is from Nevada.

My Mom:

Mom’s favorite song is “Home Means Nevada,” and she is completely tone-deaf. This does not stop her from singing. Her favorite movie is “The Quiet Man.” Bipolar, diagnosed when she was 63 (a very belated explanation of the vagaries of my childhood experience of her). Very helpful with the children; has cherubs for sleepovers every week.

Favorite quote: “Anna, I didn’t have cancer to ruin your wedding!”

Totem animal: Very much a cat. “In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.” – Terry Pratchett

Her SuperPower: Brilliance.

M-I-L:
Mother in law. Mother of The Hubs. Adult child of alcoholics. Survivor of domestic violence. Goes by “Nana,” and is occasionally helpful with the cherubs. Really likes Christmas and Snow White. Likes baseball, and is a season ticket holder for the Spokane Indians. Roots for the Mariners and the Seahawks.

Her SuperPower: Dealing With It.

Her totem animal: uhh, I’m not sure, but I’d say like a bear or something. Mama Bear.

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